About miracles. Sounds remarkably like a dvar torah you can hear at Aish or Chabad (except for the swearing.)
For example: "Miracles.... it's all around you and you dont even know it, it's crazy." And this: "And I dont want to talk to a scientist, ya'll mother******* lying, and getting me pissed."
These lines coming straight from the mouth of a bunch of tattooed rappers in clownface.
Amazing
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
An Open Letter To Lebron James
Come to New York. Your country needs you here. This may sound melodramatic, but hear me out. You might have noticed that the US has gone through some difficult financial times over the past year. Bubbles burst, stock markets collapsed, bailouts were needed, recessions have lingered, etc. You may also be aware that a lot of these things originated in New York. The Big Apple is the financial capital of the country, and is uniquely responsible for our economic health.
So, you may ask: how would your coming to New York help the situation? Let me explain: Finance is a confidence game. Of course the real-world economics of deals have to work, but everything else comes down to confidence. And that is the greatest commodity you can bring here.
In many ways the Knicks have mirrored Wall Street incompetence over the last decade. Both institutions overpayed for bloated assets, employed short sighted decision making at the expense of long term planning, and suffered from poor leadership. Isiah Thomas and Chuck Prince are so similar they could easily be called brothers from another mother. But, the team has changed. The Knicks are offloading nonperforming assets, focusing on the future, and are under new management. The team is poised for a resurgence, and so is Wall Street. But the Knicks need a centerpiece, and the Street needs a symbol. You could be both.
You coming here would give the team the talent and championship swagger it has not had in a long, long time. The City would feed off that swagger. You would become the symbol of renewed faith in our team and in our City. Confidence would flow back into town; and the team, the City, The Street and our entire financial system would benefit.
A word about Cleveland. I understand how much you mean to that City. Other than your presence, they have had a bad run of things. A great argument could be made that you are a cosmic reward for all Cleveland's suffering. So, this year win them a Championship. You deserve it. Big Z deserves it. The fans deserve it. Cleveland deserves it. But after the trophy is handed out, say your goodbyes, you will have done your duty there. Then come and fulfill your destiny here.
It is the rare athlete who has the ability and opportunity to transcend sports and become legendary. Examples include Jesse Owens, Joe DiMaggio, Mohammad Ali, Jackie Robinson, and The 1980 US Hockey Team. You have been given the athletic ability to transcend your sport. You now have the opportunity to mean something greater to your society. Come to New York. Your legend awaits.
So, you may ask: how would your coming to New York help the situation? Let me explain: Finance is a confidence game. Of course the real-world economics of deals have to work, but everything else comes down to confidence. And that is the greatest commodity you can bring here.
In many ways the Knicks have mirrored Wall Street incompetence over the last decade. Both institutions overpayed for bloated assets, employed short sighted decision making at the expense of long term planning, and suffered from poor leadership. Isiah Thomas and Chuck Prince are so similar they could easily be called brothers from another mother. But, the team has changed. The Knicks are offloading nonperforming assets, focusing on the future, and are under new management. The team is poised for a resurgence, and so is Wall Street. But the Knicks need a centerpiece, and the Street needs a symbol. You could be both.
You coming here would give the team the talent and championship swagger it has not had in a long, long time. The City would feed off that swagger. You would become the symbol of renewed faith in our team and in our City. Confidence would flow back into town; and the team, the City, The Street and our entire financial system would benefit.
A word about Cleveland. I understand how much you mean to that City. Other than your presence, they have had a bad run of things. A great argument could be made that you are a cosmic reward for all Cleveland's suffering. So, this year win them a Championship. You deserve it. Big Z deserves it. The fans deserve it. Cleveland deserves it. But after the trophy is handed out, say your goodbyes, you will have done your duty there. Then come and fulfill your destiny here.
It is the rare athlete who has the ability and opportunity to transcend sports and become legendary. Examples include Jesse Owens, Joe DiMaggio, Mohammad Ali, Jackie Robinson, and The 1980 US Hockey Team. You have been given the athletic ability to transcend your sport. You now have the opportunity to mean something greater to your society. Come to New York. Your legend awaits.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
BestFilms of the 2000s
It's the time for making lists, so I figured Id get in on the action. Here are my faves in random order. There are 47 of them. I was going for 50 but thought Id leave 3 spots open in case I forgot any. What do you think?
The Dark Knight; Crash; Reign Over Me; Wall-E; Synecdoche NY; Dogville; Amelie; Almost Famous; Avatar; The Lives of Others; In America; Hotel Rwanda; Tsotsi; The Departed; Donnie Darko; Juno; O Brother Where Art Thou; Memento; Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind; Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon; Mystic River; There will be Blood; City of God; Finding Nemo; Shrek; Casino Royale; Kill Bill; 21 Grams; Snatch; Stranger Than Fiction; The Ring; Blow; Napolean Dynamite; Superbad; Sin City; Hurt Locker; The Fountain; Sunshine; The Prestige; I Am Sam; Training Day; Hero; Ushpizin; Zoolander; Requiem for a Dream; Love Actually; The House of Sand and Fog
The Dark Knight; Crash; Reign Over Me; Wall-E; Synecdoche NY; Dogville; Amelie; Almost Famous; Avatar; The Lives of Others; In America; Hotel Rwanda; Tsotsi; The Departed; Donnie Darko; Juno; O Brother Where Art Thou; Memento; Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind; Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon; Mystic River; There will be Blood; City of God; Finding Nemo; Shrek; Casino Royale; Kill Bill; 21 Grams; Snatch; Stranger Than Fiction; The Ring; Blow; Napolean Dynamite; Superbad; Sin City; Hurt Locker; The Fountain; Sunshine; The Prestige; I Am Sam; Training Day; Hero; Ushpizin; Zoolander; Requiem for a Dream; Love Actually; The House of Sand and Fog
Monday, November 16, 2009
In Praise of Bill Belichick
I never thought I would post under this heading; but here I am. I have hated the Patriots for a long time. I freely admit that it is an irrational hatred, based on personal bias. But still, those are perfectly acceptable and mostly encouraged for sports fans.
Anyway, last night Coach B made a coaching decision in a losing cause that is being villified by most analysts. I wont detail in football terms what happened because if you care, you already know, and if you dont you wont understand. But basically, the coach made a decision that was statistically smart, but greatly against conventional wisdom. The stats said that if one decision was made, the team would have a 79% chance of victory; whereas if the other choice were made there would be a 70% chance of winning. Conventional coaching theory said go with the second choice.
The Patriots coach went with the right move, convention be damned, and his team lost. It was the best move, but sometimes, the best move does not work out.
If we only had world leaders who made decisions based on what is actually the best decision as opposed to what is perceived to be the best decision, we would live in a much better place.
Anyway, last night Coach B made a coaching decision in a losing cause that is being villified by most analysts. I wont detail in football terms what happened because if you care, you already know, and if you dont you wont understand. But basically, the coach made a decision that was statistically smart, but greatly against conventional wisdom. The stats said that if one decision was made, the team would have a 79% chance of victory; whereas if the other choice were made there would be a 70% chance of winning. Conventional coaching theory said go with the second choice.
The Patriots coach went with the right move, convention be damned, and his team lost. It was the best move, but sometimes, the best move does not work out.
If we only had world leaders who made decisions based on what is actually the best decision as opposed to what is perceived to be the best decision, we would live in a much better place.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Reason # 3276 I dislike the law
Yesterdays NY Law Journal highlighted two cases in which plaintiffs were awarded money. In the first case, a probationary worker hired at some government agency was fired after 25 or so weeks for using the agency's loudspeaker system to make disparaging remarks about her supervisors. In the second case, a man had spent close to 2 years in prison for a crime he didnt commit because a forensics lab screwed up their fingerprint analysis.
One plaintiff banked $1.8 million. The other one got $140k.
As you might have figured out from the title of the post, the fired temp worker got the million dollar payday for having her 'due process' rights denied, while the poor shlub who was imprisoned got the lesser amount.
How this fits into anyone's sense of Justice is mindboggling to me.
One plaintiff banked $1.8 million. The other one got $140k.
As you might have figured out from the title of the post, the fired temp worker got the million dollar payday for having her 'due process' rights denied, while the poor shlub who was imprisoned got the lesser amount.
How this fits into anyone's sense of Justice is mindboggling to me.
Honest Abe
That's not true
said the boy
the wise men have no clue
they pray to a toy
and expect me to too
They tell me a tale
saying I should believe
or they'll throw me in jail
till I bow on my knees
But their story's a lie
and their faith just a fraud
so I plan to defy
in a way deep and broad
Their gods I will smash
with my tools into dust
then Ill rock like the Clash
their foundation I must
My culture is wrong
its ideals based on myth
but alone Im not strong
I need help to come with
Get thee out
Said a voice
And Ill show you about
You do have a choice
I can show you the route
said the boy
the wise men have no clue
they pray to a toy
and expect me to too
They tell me a tale
saying I should believe
or they'll throw me in jail
till I bow on my knees
But their story's a lie
and their faith just a fraud
so I plan to defy
in a way deep and broad
Their gods I will smash
with my tools into dust
then Ill rock like the Clash
their foundation I must
My culture is wrong
its ideals based on myth
but alone Im not strong
I need help to come with
Get thee out
Said a voice
And Ill show you about
You do have a choice
I can show you the route
Friday, October 16, 2009
High Tide
My neighbors all mocked me
they said I was fool
To think it was noticed
the poison we drool
Rich times were rolling
poor times were too
As abuses mounted
in march to deluge
Now it dont matter
the life that we had
Our culture developed
both good and bad
Some things I salvaged
most I could not
Can youth learn their lesson
or turn back to rot
For me it has ended
I've seen the new leaf
And drown out life's sorrow
in fermented grief
they said I was fool
To think it was noticed
the poison we drool
Rich times were rolling
poor times were too
As abuses mounted
in march to deluge
Now it dont matter
the life that we had
Our culture developed
both good and bad
Some things I salvaged
most I could not
Can youth learn their lesson
or turn back to rot
For me it has ended
I've seen the new leaf
And drown out life's sorrow
in fermented grief
Monday, October 12, 2009
Wonderful Smells
It’s not often that I associate NYC with wonderful smells. When I think NY scents I immediately imagine maple syrup, subway odor or Hudson stench. To be fair, maybe Ill think of the Mexican truck. But, for the past couple of weeks, upon coming home, I have been greeted with the most wonderful olfactory delights. You see, a new couple moved in downstairs from me, and someone in that apartment is always cooking up the most amazing food. I wouldn’t be surprised if the fare is un-kasherable, but every day I am more and more tempted to knock on the door and demand recipes. Would that be weird?
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Honey Crisp
with skin so shiny
you tempt me close
oneglimpseofyou
inflames
my soul to the point of
breaking just to have you
for my own forbidden
tart tangy soft and sweet
evenow satisfies
this craving for the
juices that
flow from your tender
flesh succulent like no
man has the right to
expect firmness unparalleled
i devour you like a cougar
to the core
where my being shudders
damn - you're a fine apple
you tempt me close
oneglimpseofyou
inflames
my soul to the point of
breaking just to have you
for my own forbidden
tart tangy soft and sweet
evenow satisfies
this craving for the
juices that
flow from your tender
flesh succulent like no
man has the right to
expect firmness unparalleled
i devour you like a cougar
to the core
where my being shudders
damn - you're a fine apple
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Slide This One Right Over
Dear [Name of nice restaurant we all ate at a few days ago withheld]:
I deeply apologize for the recent actions of my friends during our delicious meal at your fine establishment. It wasn't that our meals weren't satisfying enough, it was just that that darn slider looked so sad and lonely sitting all by itself on the other table.
Our mothers always told us not to let food go to waste, so when the customers got up from their table, left a large wad of bills and put on their coats, it seemed safe to assume that the fully-intact slider left on their plate was just going to go in the garbage. And when goaded by a friend with $5 bill to get up and just take that slider - well, one of us couldn't resist.
Some of us maintained our sense of decency, but one of DaBoys, couldn't bear to see that tiny, yummy burger go to waste. After slathering on a good dose of sauce and fried onions, he wasted no time in enjoying the bounty pilfered from the other table. Considerately, this DaBoy stopped midchew to offer the others at the table a bite, but we all politely refused. After all, we're happy to take from strangers, but not from our friends.
Ultimately, the DaDoy finished off the slider, making sure to clean his plate of the extra onions as well. I decided it would be smart to put the empty plate back on our neighbor's table, so as not to confuse our waiter. Considerate, no?
Not long after our laughter subsided and conversation shifted away from this incident... the customers from the other table reentered the restaurant smelling subtly of cigarette smoke! What? Did they intentionally leave one complete slider on their plate to finish after their cigarette break?
All we could do was laugh. Giggles and muffled snorts flew from our table. We're not sure if our fellow-customers even noticed the missing burger, or if they really did plan to eat it after their excursion, but we did make sure to check our bill for the price of 1/3rd of a plate of 3 sliders....
So, thank you, [restaurant's name], in advance for not kicking us out next time we show up at your door. I am sure that the surveillance video from the camera pointed directly at our table served to be pure entertainment for your waitstaff.
Sincerely,
DaGirl
I deeply apologize for the recent actions of my friends during our delicious meal at your fine establishment. It wasn't that our meals weren't satisfying enough, it was just that that darn slider looked so sad and lonely sitting all by itself on the other table.
Our mothers always told us not to let food go to waste, so when the customers got up from their table, left a large wad of bills and put on their coats, it seemed safe to assume that the fully-intact slider left on their plate was just going to go in the garbage. And when goaded by a friend with $5 bill to get up and just take that slider - well, one of us couldn't resist.
Some of us maintained our sense of decency, but one of DaBoys, couldn't bear to see that tiny, yummy burger go to waste. After slathering on a good dose of sauce and fried onions, he wasted no time in enjoying the bounty pilfered from the other table. Considerately, this DaBoy stopped midchew to offer the others at the table a bite, but we all politely refused. After all, we're happy to take from strangers, but not from our friends.
Ultimately, the DaDoy finished off the slider, making sure to clean his plate of the extra onions as well. I decided it would be smart to put the empty plate back on our neighbor's table, so as not to confuse our waiter. Considerate, no?
Not long after our laughter subsided and conversation shifted away from this incident... the customers from the other table reentered the restaurant smelling subtly of cigarette smoke! What? Did they intentionally leave one complete slider on their plate to finish after their cigarette break?
All we could do was laugh. Giggles and muffled snorts flew from our table. We're not sure if our fellow-customers even noticed the missing burger, or if they really did plan to eat it after their excursion, but we did make sure to check our bill for the price of 1/3rd of a plate of 3 sliders....
So, thank you, [restaurant's name], in advance for not kicking us out next time we show up at your door. I am sure that the surveillance video from the camera pointed directly at our table served to be pure entertainment for your waitstaff.
Sincerely,
DaGirl
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